To the Young Single Mom During the Holidays
Dear Strong Mama,
It’s the “most wonderful time of the year,” or so the song says. And I truly believe it is. But, I realize that for a young mom like you taking care of her children on her own, it can also be a thousand kinds of hard. Maybe you feel pressure to make everything “Merry and Bright” for your child when you are worn out at the end of a long day. Perhaps you feel like “How in the world am I supposed to make things magical when I am just trying to get by?” Or perhaps you feel like you wish you could give your child a “picture perfect” family for Christmas, and worry that you are not enough.
Beautiful Young Mom, this is what I want you to know this holiday season.
You are not incomplete, and your family is perfect.
One of the natural joys of being a mother is that you were made for your baby and your baby was made for you. The two of you are a perfectly formed family and have been since the beginning. As time goes on, your family may grow, but even if it doesn’t, the two of you are enough for each other. Truly, surely, meant to be.
Comparison will steal your joy.
You are uniquely you, and your story is 100% yours. Do and be the best that you can be, and don’t worry about what someone else is doing. Comparing your journey to others is simply a waste of time. Keep your gaze on your little family and strive to give them your best. Don’t worry about the opinions and actions of others, and don’t let someone else’s achievements take away from your victories, big and small.
More stuff doesn’t equal a happy child.
Moms always want to give their kids the world. You are not alone in this. Every mother feels this way when it comes the holidays. But the truth is, more doesn’t equal better. Don’t worry or beat yourself up if you can’t give your kids all the material things you would like to this holiday season. Focus every day on giving them a mother that will love and support them through anything. That is truly the very best gift you can give your children…and one they will never outgrow.
Single doesn’t have to mean lonely.
You don’t have to be alone and lonely just because you are parenting without a partner. You do have people in your life who love you and who are cheering you on. Reach out to your community of family and friends and embrace your community this holiday season. Open your heart and share your little family with another young mom looking for someone who gets what she is going through. The holidays are about giving, and when you spend time with your community you are giving and receiving in the best way. Loving others costs nothing, and adds everything.
Mama, more than anything this holiday season, I want you to know you are loved, and so is your child. You are seen, you are admired, and you are valued. Rather than feeling stressed and overwhelmed this holiday season, I pray you feel treasured. You are your child’s whole world, and you were made for this. You are enough…at this and at any time of year.